Part of the Process

There are times when even I surprise myself. For instance, when I am home out of public view or in my car out of the public ear, every so often I will let loose with a tirade of vile and offensive jabber that most anyone would find to be insulting. Usually during those moments my outburst is triggered by something or someone that has upset me. My vocal explosion is a way of venting the negative feelings I am having. I purposefully blast away in that manner beyond public scrutiny to avoid offending any one or from making anyone think I am a real, shall we say, jerk. Also, I do not want anything thinking I am something I am not. In heart and mind, I am not how I might sound at those times; nor does the sentiments I express accurately true feelings or beliefs. I express them to release my frustration as part of a process I sometimes use to help formulate thoughts that really do reflect my inner thinking and attitude.

This brings me to a video currently making the rounds on You Tube. It is about ten minutes of MSNBC commentator Lawrence O'Donnell having an off camera meltdown over something going on in the control room of his set. Unfortunately for O'Donnell, his tirade was caught on film. To say the least, O'Donnell does not come across very well. (Neither would I or, I suspect, any one caught in the throes of a tantrum or meltdown.) Other public figures have had the same thing happen to them. Bill O'Reilly is one example that comes to mind. Their outbursts were filmed and taped without their knowledge. I concede that watching such things may be fun. At the same time, I caution any of us to judge O'Donnell, O'Reilly and others caught in an unguarded moment too harshly. Like it or not, at times none of us share our feelings in ways that are honorable. I say that not as an excuse, but as a reminder of a reality that is all of us. Every so often we all a need a chance to communicate poorly on our intended way to communicate more properly. It is part of the process.