Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Reputation

In recent times it seems as if we have been hearing about the word "reputation" a good deal. Accusations seem to be flying back and forth regarding the level of one's reputation or standing among their peers and general public. Some people, because of who they work or associate with, have expressed concern about their reputations. Others have tried to bolster their reputations by becoming more vocal about issues of the day. All this can certainly make one wonder just how sturdy a person's reputation might be. Is it, in fact, something that can ever be locked-in and never changed or altered?

In "Othello" by Shakespeare (who else?) the character Cassio laments how his reputation has been damaged by false accusations. He moans,"Reputation, reputation, reputation! O! I have lost my reputation. I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial......." In Cassio's case, he had a right to be upset because he was charged with something unjustly and through no fault of his own. But not everyone who views their reputation as being under siege is innocent as was Cassio. At times, folks can do harm to their own reputations. Sadly, of those, some fail to recognize that they might be the cause of their dilemma.

The point is often we are in-charge of how we are perceived particularly when it comes to communication. People who lie, for instance, should not be surprised that they are viewed negatively. At the same time, those striving to be honest are much better able to help create a better or more positive reputation for themselves. That effort must be ongoing because the reality is reputations are not locked-in. As usual, Shakespeare said it best in "Othello" through Iago in his reaction to Cassio's lament. "Reputation is an idle and most false imposition; oft got without merit, and lost without deserving......."  


  

Saturday, May 27, 2017

"We Listen"

The other day I saw a poster on a community bulletin board advertising the opening of a new counseling center. I was struck by its one tag line: "We listen."  I mean that as a compliment. As beings with the ability to communicate in as many ways as is possible, we are born to be heard. We live to express ourselves because - let's be honest - each of us is so darn special. Always we are giving or sending out messages. Putting forth a message is a lot more easy and preferable than receiving one. For one thing, it is less work. For another, sending rather than receiving means we dot quite have to spend as much effort thinking about others.

So, to see an office claiming to listen to whatever its clientele might wish to say is very appealing. After all, my guess is most of us go through our days thinking we are not heard as well as we should be anyway. To claim to listen is to claim more than that act implies. Actual and effective listening is far more than the physical act of hearing what is being said. It also involves hearing with empathy, understanding the perspective or intent of what is behind the words being expressed. That very definitely is no small thing. The fact is while we usually know what we mean, those on the receiving end of our words don't. But by claiming to "listen," one is saying it can and will make the effort to understand.

In the act of communication, it is listening that often ends up on the "short end of the stick." In other words, most of us do not either do it as well as we should or place as much importance on it as we do sending out a message. One of our most basic needs is to feel important, as if we make a difference. Being listened to gives us that feeling. So, not knowing much about this counseling firm than what is on its flier, it certainly is offering to give people what they want and even need. I, for one, hope it does well.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

A Final Bow

It is one of those items that one cannot let pass without comment. I am talking about the closing of the Barnum & Bailey - Ringling Brothers Circus. After 146 years, "The Greatest Show on Earth" is no more. It is sad in the sense that the circus triggers images of Americana when the country and its people were a lot more innocent, more simple and perhaps even more well-intentioned in their day-to-day lives. That picture, of course, may have little to do with reality, but it is one that settles nicely on the heart and mind. The hard truth is that the circus was not generating nearly enough revenue to cover its operating costs. People were looking elsewhere for entertainment.

In terms of communication, the fact P.T. Barnum, a master showman, played a major role in the rise of the circus is not without significance. Many communication scholars view Barnum as being a pioneer in what later came to be called "public relations." Researchers James Grunig and Todd Hunt, for instance, labeled one form of public relations as "press agentry" and credited Barnum with the inspiration for it. The press agentry model of public relations, they said, represents an anything-goes approach to promoting a product or event. Truth in such a model, according to Grunig and Hunt, plays a very tiny role in how public relations is carried out.     

Barnum's famous quote, "A sucker is born every minute" should give one a good idea as to his loyalty to the truth. He was very well known for saying or claiming pretty much anything to get people to buy a ticket to his shows. In keeping with that, I remember one of the very last circuses I attended a number of years ago with my daughter revolved around what they billed as showcasing the world's only unicorn. (No, it was not a unicorn but, rather, a white horse with a horn stuck to its forehead. No one was fooled that I could tell. But at the same time, my daughter sure had a good time. To me, that is what counted the most. Thanks for that, circus folks.  
    

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Little Dogs

They approached each like two gunslingers from the old west. Neither hesitated as they moved closer and closer to each other. Without question, a fight was about to erupt. The two combatants would rush each other without hesitation or mercy. Pity the person who stood in their way. Then, seemingly at the last moment, each one's owner gave a sharpe yank on the leash on which the two would-be enemies were held. The fight that seemed inevitable was stopped before it started. The two apparent enemies would have to wait another day before settling their score. Time would have to pass before one would emerge as top dog.

The two gladiators I witnessed in this scenario were actually little what I would call yip-yip dogs. Tiny little critters with chips on their shoulders. Their attitude was one of deviance. Pity any challenger that got in their way. What they were communicating was "Respectful interaction is for sissies........No way am I interested in what anyone else has to say." The two little dogs we're not interested in any kind of meaningful interaction. Forcing their will and/or view on others seemed to be the only thing that interested them. Fortunately, cooler heads in the form of their owners prevailed. There was no fight that day.

Looking at those two dogs, I could not help but reflect on the attitude many people today seem to carry with them. I base that on the polarization that exists in the world today. More people than is healthy walk around with little or no desire to interact with others having different or, even worse, opposing perspectives. As a result, we see much talking at rather than talking with. The result is division and high differences. It is fine to have a firm but varied perspective. What is not great, however, is  not respecting what others might be thinking. This comprises any chance of actual or meaningful interaction. That is never a good thing.

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

"The Pipes are Broken"

It happens. Any one who has ever lived in an apartment complex for a period of time expects that eventually something will need to be fixed. A door will come off its hinges. A faucet will leak. The air conditioning will not work as well as it should. These and so many other bumps occur. Yes, these malfunctions are annoying. Nor do they ever happen at a "good time." Despite that, people understand this part of life and, generally, roll with it. So long as the folks whose job it is to address these issues actually do their job, then the inconvenience of occasional mechanical breakdowns are tolerable. 

But what happens when the repair people do not do their job? In this case, I am not referring to the actual fixing-up that is needed. Rather, I speak of what I call the communication aspect. Let me illustrate: A tenant has a leaky faucet. They call the proper person and he or she tells them they will be by in the next two hours. But a few minutes after that call, another tenants bangs on the superintendent's door saying their apartment is flooding because water is coming down through the ceiling from the apartment above them. Because of the urgency of this problem, the superintendent directs their attention to addressing it. Doing that, however, takes the rest of the day. Meanwhile, the tenant with the leaky faucet is waiting to have their problem fixed - all the while not knowing the superintendent is trying to address a bigger problem. 

In such a scenario, there are no "bad guys." But if you multiple that initial tenant by five or ten people, then what was a small, easily explained circumstance has now mushroomed into a major cause for the concern. The reason is a lack of communication. People are not told what is going on and the result is mounting frustration. The lack of communication has become a bigger problem than the needed repairs. Sometimes, this cannot be helped. Often times, however, it can. The trick for all of us is to be more sensitive to keeping people informed. As a general rule, they usually do much better.         

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Push-Pull

I remember the movie version of the Doctor Dolittle series in which a strange-looking creature called a "push-me-pull-you" was introduced. This unique critter looked very much like a llama except it had two heads - one of its front and one at its back. "I've never seen anything like it!" one of Dr. Dolittle's colleagues sang out. (Such a reaction was highly appropriate as, after all, this was a musical.) What triggered my memory of that movie and that scene was some recent reading I have done on marketing strategies followed by persons attempting to promote companies to international markets. The two primary categories many professionals use are called "push" and "pull" strategies, according to authors Charles Hill and G. Tomas Hult.

A push strategy is characterized by promoters making in-person pitches to potential clients or customers. A push strategy is when promotion is conducted via media advertising. Given these differences, one question popping into my mind is: "Which one is better? Which strategy generates the most positive results?" To that, the response has to be it depends upon the circumstance. The two types of strategy may seem to be tightly linked, but the reality is they are quite different in that their objectives are different. The push strategy is geared for a small or even intimate audience while the pull strategy focuses on much larger numbers.   

You see push-pull strategies followed in all kind of areas where outreach is conducted. Examples are found in such scenarios as the traditional selling of products and fund raising campaigns to the promotion of political candidates and recruitment of students by colleges and universities. If done well, the two should complement each other. In real estate, to give one instance, a pull strategy may be used to bring potential buyers to an open house, but then a push strategy represents the follow-up when the real estate agent sits down with the interested parties to hopefully make a sale. Push-pull outreach showcases the importance of well coordinated communication efforts.             

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Crossing the Line

Often we hear the expression, "You have crossed the line." This can apply for a number of contexts or circumstances. For instance, my daughter and the man she married were co-workers and friends several years before they went out on their first date. Finally, at some point, they "crossed a line" that changed their relationship into a romantic one. What happened? What exactly was that point or moment where and when the shift occurred? And what internal bell inside one's head goes off that informs them that how they view another person is no longer the same nor in all likelihood ever will be?

Of course, crossing such a line does not always relate in a positive way as it did with my daughter. Many times "crossing the line" pertains to a negative turn of events. A sadly spectacular example is fresh in the news these days. It involves President Trump and his decision to fire James Comey, director of Federal Bureau of Investigation. Trump claims the reason or his action revolved the manner in which Comey dealt with his investigation of Hillary Clinton's emails during the 2016 presidential campaign. Never mind that for months and months now Trump and his representatives have been highly complementary of Comey. This abrupt decision runs smack in the face of all that. Further, to my mind, it represents a crossing of the line by Trump.

Particularly since Trump entered the political arena, the public has been subjected to an unending array of purposeful distortions and lies fro this man. For reasons I still do not understand, many folks have accepted this trait of Trump's without letting it cause their decision to support or at least accept him. Time will tell as it always does, but my sense is his firing of the FBI director and claims that he did so because Comey had lost the trust of the general public will be a line-crossing in the minds of folks in unprecedented numbers. Whatever credibility Trump had with the great majority of the general public is now gone. He will not get it back.      



  

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Legacy

Why do we communicate? Why do we write? Heck. Why do we do anything? Sure, in large part, actions we take are often driven by the moment. We feel hunger, so we eat. We desire company, so we seek friends. We feel tired, so we rest. But I also believe our actions are, at times, driven by a larger purpose. Steps we take are motivated by something more than simply responding to what is in front of us. Perhaps this is an age-thing, but lately I find myself assessing my day-to-day steps or movements and, as a result, am trying to steer myself toward might be viewed as a higher purpose in what I do.

For instance, over the past few years I have been fortunate enough to have nine books published. Most of them have been communication-related textbooks. One was a humor book. In early 2018, I am slated to have my tenth book published as well as a second edition of an earlier textbook. (This tenth book is a children's book.) I am very proud of all that. Also, I am extremely pleased as these books represent successful efforts on my part to have thoughts of mine and information I have gathered given a certain degree of permancy. Collectively, years from now, they will confirm that I existed. I like that very much.

All those represent part of my legacy. Whether or not it is true, I like to believe a sign of maturity is embracing the reality that our actions, including how and what we communicate, represent our part of the world's evolution. On some level, our daily steps touch others and, therefore, shape the direction of those others and, generally, our world. For me, I try hard to make my steps ones that are positive. Going back to my books, it is a big reason why I made a point I'd dedicating each one to specific persons I hold most dear. It is, at least to me, a legacy-thing. I realize others may not agree with this perspective. It is ok if most don't. Still, it is something I wanted to share.

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Sherlock Holmes: The Great Listener

Throughout all of literature, readers have been blessed with being introduced to and entertained a multitude of fascinating and memorable characters. To my mind, one of the most famous and memorable is that great detective Sherlock Holmes. The creation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Holmes has been the subject of over 60 stories by Doyle along with numerous motion pictures and television shows. This character, known for his keen intellect, steadfast bravery and powers of observation, remains as timeless as any that I can think of. Even now, over a century since he was introduced to the world, a Holmes adventure remains an enjoyable journey for any reader.

You might guess, in the true fashion of Holmes himself, that recently I had the pleasure of, shall we say, reacquainting myself with the great detective and his loyal companion, Dr. John Watson. Throughout my time with Doyle's invention, I kept asking myself what exactly made Holmes such an insightful and, ultimately, successful detective. Obviously, he is a man of high intelligence, broad experience, and strong will. Anything else? After much pondering, the answer appeared much like the many clues Holmes uncovered in his many cases. Holmes, as much as anything, was a great communicator.

Specifically, Holmes' ability listen to those who came to him for help in solving crimes ranging from theft to kidnapping to murder is as powerful as any character I can name. Case after case he would turn his attention to the stories of others and then begin connecting the pieces of information he would draw from clients and others until he deduced the answer to a mystery that had been alluding all around him. Holmes was and is a great listener. His character serves as a shining example of how effective we can be in the world of communicating if we devote our energies to listening. That is definitely no small thing.