"Myside Bias"

There used to be an old saying that went something like this: "You can't tell any body something they don't already know." The basic meaning of this comment was that people only listened to perspectives which fit their own narrative or opinion. Otherwise, they paid little attention to any facts or points of view with which they disagreed. True or not, this certainly painted a negative picture of how open minded people were. This old saying has since been updated with a new a tag line: "myside bias." It, too, speaks to the observation that people are primarily open to that with which they already agree. If true, other interpretations, conflicting facts or differences of opinion are aspects of communication or, on a larger scale, enlightenment that people continue to not wish to listen to hear or be bothered with.

My concern is not that this paints us in a negative light. Rather, I am worried  it may be increasingly accurate. If so, the consequences are far reaching. Imagine living in a world where everyone is so certain of what they know that they are uninterested in perspectives that may vary from theirs or any new information that may come along that possibly makes the set of facts to which they cling obsolete or, in heaven forbid, inaccurate? In such a world everyone would practically have their own reality. How would that affect such things as collaboration, tolerance or communication? Would it lead to greater amounts of conflict, isolation and division? Would anything even akin to harmony over a sustained amount of time exist?

I, for one, would not want to be part of a world where certainty reigns. A big part of the magic of us is that we remain unintimidated by the unknown. We are driven by our desire to see what lies beyond the river's bend. In other words, one distinguishing characteristic of our species is our open mindedness. But I look at such realities as the rise of niche journalism and the fact members of the United States Congress seem so unwilling to work with each other due to their so-called certainty over the correctness of their ideology. The ever-growing result of these particular circumstances ranges from low morale and frustration to stagnation and cynism. For communicators, this creates a major challenge: getting people to become comfortable with feelings of uncertainty and brave enough to work with others to seek answers in a collaborative manner.

Thank You to the Reminders of the World

I am writing this entry on Thanksgiving, 2011. One of the significant aspects of this day is that it marks the official beginning of our time of giving thanks. Ideally, of course, we should all be giving thanks throughout the year without needing to be reminded of it via a national holiday. It seems we are a nation of people who need gentle or sometimes not-so-gentle reminders about things we need to do or take care of. That could very well be the main reason the post-it industry is so successful. "Don't forget your doctor's appoitment today." "Don't forget to call your mother." "Don't forget junior has soccer practice this afternoon." "Don't forget to turn the oven on at 3:30 today." The reminders go on and on.

In my view, reminding others of things they need to do or, at least, not forget is an important communication skill. After all, none of us can remember everything. From time to time, for instance, I need to be reminded of upcoming doctor appointments. And then there's the matter of remembering everything I have been asked to pick up at the grocery store. Without question, I am a direct beneficiary of reminders. (Come to think of it. I probably need to be reminded of that every so often.)

My point on this great day of thanks is that I wish to give thanks to the people who do the reminding. They are the great helpers of the world; the ones who try to look out after others. Few things make us feel more grateful than being reminded of something we completely forgot. Yet, their job - if I may call it that - is a thankless one. Sometimes, without warning, reminders cross an invisible line and enter into the world of nagging, particularly when they remind somebody of something that the person has not forgotten. Still, they may get snapped at, but you can bet your juiciest drumstick that this will not stop them continuing to remind that same person who just snapped at them of something else in the future. I admire their perserverience and the fact they have planted their flag in a life of keeping others on track. Of course, then there's the matter of those who remind the reminders of things they forgot. But I'll try and write about them at another time. (I hope I don't forget.)

Wolves and Dogs

Please pardon the following gross oversimplification. All canines started out wild. It was not till years had passed before some began allowing themselves to be lured in by humans for free food and shelter. Eventually they became domesticated. This is how we came to have dogs as pets. As a self-described dog person, I have no complaints. Several of the greatest loves of my life have been dogs. Checkers was my faithful companion while growing up and Dusty took over that role when I entered into adulthood. Unfortunately, both are gone now, but my memories of them linger on in a very positive way. But I digress.

Yes, we have dogs. But we also have wolves. These critters continue to live in the wild, not taking the path toward domestication. They have a will of their own and basically do whatever they can to ensure their own survival. They are not our friends, nor do they want to be. Nevertheless, they deserve respect and have as much right to live on this planet as any other living creature, including humans. I mention wolves and dogs because I cannot help equate them with journalists and public relations practitioners. Both started out from the communications gene pool. Yet one chose to remain in the wild while the other selected a life of domesticity.

A journalist's existence is one of detachment. This person observes, reports and attempts to learn the who, what, where, when, why and how of what goes on around them. Their survival lies in how well and accurately they answer these fundamental questions. They challenge, they poke, and they pry. Public relations practitioners also observe and strive to learn the fundamental facts of things. Their lives are the opposite of detachment. Being domesticated, they work with those who employ them to determine how best to communicate what they learn. Interestingly, as is the case with journalists, a public relations practitioner's survival is based on how well and accurately they report what they know. The two are forever connected, yet forever distinct as well.

Combover

All of us have seen men who are losing their hair. As a man not nearly as young as I used to be, my heart goes out to them as I still have hair on the top of my head and dread the day when that may no longer be the case. This is why I feel a special degree of sympathy for those men whose hair thickness is, shall we say, no longer what it used to be. These men wear their hair in the style of a combover in order to cover their balding plate and, if they are lucky, perhaps make others think they still have at least close to a full head of hair. I appreciate their effort because there may come a time in my life when I, too, resort to the combover.

Despite the impression a combover may give, those with this so called hair style either are going bald or are close enough to where they already are bald. No amount of swept over hair is going to change that reality. One point is: combovers are nothing more than diversions designed to cover up (no pun intended) the truth. Granted, it is harmless and no one who does it, has done it or will do it is should be punished or criticized for their attempt to postpone living with the inevitable reality. Having said that, another harsh reality is that combovers fool no one. They are as easy to spot as a unicorn at a bull roast.

Another point here is that efforts to cover up or hide the truth are never successful forever. People either spot deception right away or at some point the actual truth eventually reveals itself. More often than not, when truth does come out, it is like an unstoppable avalanche. Professional communicators need to take this to heart. When communicating, be honest. When communicating, do not compromise the truth. When communicating, do not mislead. Combovers are ok when it comes to hiding impending baldness, but they are not acceptable when standing in the way of undeniable truth.

Perpetual Conflict

I always enjoy coming across new ideas that provide greater insight into the challenges of communication. Recently, I "discovered" biologist E.O. Wilson who has put forth a new theory on man's behavior. Wilson says man is driven by what he labels "group selection" and "individual selection." Group selection is characterized by man's recognition that we need each other to survive. As a result, we create connections with others in the form of such things as clubs, neighborhoods, family units, shopping centers, and even Facebook. On the other hand, individual selection speaks to our drive to do our own thing, stand out from the crowd, be noticed, and, in the words of Henry David Thoreau, "march to the beat of our own drummer." These two internal drives encapsulate a fundamental struggle within all of us, according to Wilson.

It is no wonder, then, that communication is such a challenging enterprise for all of us. Whether we are a professional communicator or a so-called regular person doing what they can to interact well with others, it is important to understand this internal reality within humans. Years before Wilson came on the scene, psychologist Abraham Maslow also touched on the duality within us in his hierarchy of needs. Maslow said we all possess a need for self-actualization as well as a need for acceptance and membership in a group of some sort. The idea of picturing how this internal dual personality of ours reconciles all efforts to communicate with us is intriguing.

Campaigners urge us to support their candidate. Advertisers beg us buy their product. Children try to talk other children into taking their first puff of a cigarette. The examples are plentiful. A big part of our internal decision making process is reconciling whether we want to go along with or stand apart from others. Sometimes this decision is not easy. What is interesting is that just as our eventual decisions come from one of those two places, appeals made to us are often triggered by an acknowledgment of the existence of our innate duality as articulated by Maslow and, now, Wilson.

Classic Mistake

How often do people have to make the same mistake before it finally sinks in that that is not the way to handle revelations of criminal and bad behavior? I'm talking to you Penn State. This institution and its highly-acclaimed and successful football program has been rocked to the core because of the alleged criminal behavior of one of the coaches on its team. It seems as if over a number of years he has been sexually abusing young boys. Just as tragically, folks within the organization knew about it and did little of note to stop this man's perverse behavior or did what should have been done from the beginning: go to the police.

One early consequence of this scandal is that the team's legendary coach, Joe Paterno, has been dismissed. Many are protesting this decision because of the affection and regard they have for this man who is the most successful coach in college football history. I, however, believe his removal was the best and right thing to do. From a public relations standpoint, this decision demonstrates the institution's commitment to running a clean program and the seriousness in which it is taking this matter. Further, their decision to dismiss Paterno illustrates that no one, regardless of their reputation or standing in the community, is deserving of special treatment when the law is involved.

Looking at what is happening at Penn State, I am reminded of the scandals involving the Catholic Church. It, too, has had problems with people of authority sexually abusing young boys. Church authorities also demonstrated poor and immoral judgment when dealing with their internal challenges scandals involving the sexual abuse of young boys. Both organizations tried to protect themselves rather than deal with the problem in an honest and forthright way. In the case of Penn State, it has suffered a major setback in its reputation. It now has an enormous hole of of which it is going to be digging for years to come. Good public relations is about being honest and transparent and placing those values above all else. Penn State needs to get on board with that.

Zombies

I confess I do not understand the zombie craze that seems to be sweeping our nation. Zombies seem to be everywhere: movies, television shows, video games, numerous books, and even as the subject of college courses. To me, these flesh-eating undead creatures have little going for them. They walk around stiffly with their arms extended looking to chow down on any poor living being in their path. Their gait is slow, they do not speak and their level of intelligence is about the same as a door knob. If those deficiencies are not enough, they are also highly vulnerable. A simple bash to the head of a zombie with a baseball bat seems to be enough to stop them. Off hand, I would say vampires have a lot more going for them than zombies, even on their best day.

Yet in the fickle world of pop culture, zombies definitely seem to be the belle of the ball these days. Perhaps one thing zombies do have going for them in terms of terror is that they are so relentless and single-minded even more so than, say, sharks. Sharks, at least, do sleep from time to time and, for the most part, eat only when hungry. But not zombies. For them, it's eat eat eat. Do not get me wrong. Despite their limitations, I definitely label zombies as bad things. I sure would not want to find my house surrounded by them.

In terms of communication, I equate zombies with lies except lies can be worse. Sure, lies can be stopped, but often it takes the equivalent of a baseball bat to the head to do it. They are relentless and can do a great deal of damage if left unchecked. I am concerned this kind communication zombie - lies - are infiltrating our public discourse. Professional communicators, especially ones who are hired to represent the views and positions of clients, need to be extra careful about not unleashing any zombies - even little ones. I understand the temptation, but I also understand the damage they do regardless of whether they are designed to serve a positive end. An example is when the false that former Vice President Al Gore claimed he invented the Internet. He did no such thing. Not once. Yet this lie, in some circles, seems to be accepted as fact. It is not fair to Gore or to the people on the receiving end of this communication zombie who do not know any better.

Zombies that seem to be so popular these days are notable because they are undead creatures. But untruths have a way of taking on life that does real and lasting damage to our entire society. This is why all of us, especially professional communicators, should never be far away from a baseball bat to squash them.

Occupy Communication

Looking back over 2011, it seems as if our country has seen a lot of protesting. More to the point, our country has been the subject of much protesting. We have seen thousands of people raising their voices against what they view as a federal government that has gotten far bigger than it either needs to be or should be. And then there are those who are speaking out against the fact the government has not played enough of a role in curbing the social and economic inequality that seems to have gripped our nation. Lots of angry people, all with valid perspectives, passion and comfortable in the certainty of their arguments. Either way, the various groups are doing all they can to be heard, in part, because they feel no one is listening. What's a country to do?

I do not see this situation as being hopeless or impossible to address. Despite their differences, one of the handicaps shared by both camps of concerned citizens is that neither seems to have the right kind of advocate in the halls of power: Congress or the White House. By "right kind," I mean leaders who are willing to try and rise above the raw emotion of their constituents; leaders who are compassionate and are capable of working toward the greater good of the nation rather than their own self interests. Such leaders could strive to dissect the dissatisfaction being expressed by those they represent, encapsulate what people are articulating, identify those main points that are similar in tone or substance, and then begin seeking ways to transform those points into action plans. I understand such a process is not as easy as it may sound just as I am aware that such selfless actions by elected officials are not carried out over night. But the good news is our country possesses the capability - the technology - to carry out such a massive communication effort.

Through such mechanisms as facebook, twitter, you tube and even good old fashion television, a series of townhall forums could be organized and hosted by leaders of both political parties. Such efforts could be their time to put on their listening caps rather than using comments from voters as a springboard to make campaign speeches. Conservatively, I estimate such a collective effort would attract millions of participants. Rather than simply react or try and address what is said to them, the host leaders could dialog with the participating citizens as well take extensive notes to accurately capture all that is said. Implementing such a communication process would enable all who care to regain or occupy much-needed communication and begin addressing our nation's concerns in a more inclusive way.

The Value of Instability

Our lives are not stable. Our world is not stable. Our days are filled with issues all of us worry about constantly. They range from the well being of our loved ones, the security of our jobs and our ability to meet our financial obligations to world peace, the mysterious sound our car engine makes in the morning and whether our favorite sports team is going to do well. The list, of course, is endless and is filled with issues of consequence as well as those that some might view as trivial. Either way, these worries are a constant part of our days. They fill our moments and if, by chance, they go away, they will be quickly replaced by others. To live a life of non-worry is to not live in reality. Is this a bother? At times, yes. Does it cause us stress? No doubt about it. But would I, for one, have it any other way? Not for a second.

My reason for that is articulated quite nicely in Aldous Huxley's classic, "Brave New World."The premise of this book is that people dwell in an environment of total and controlled stability. As the leader known as "the controller" says, "People are happy; they get what they want, and they never want what they can't get. They're well off; they're safe; they're never ill; they're not afraid of death; they're blissfully ignorant of passion and old age...........they're so conditioned that they practically can't help behaving as they ought to behave." This monologue is all part of the controller's rant against liberty. In his so-called brave new world, stability trumps happiness.

It is an interesting argument. To me, however, it reinforces the reality that is man's own innate desire for happiness. Just as we contend with a constant string of sources of worry each day, we also do what we can to move toward a greater level of happiness. But happiness does not come easy because it is constantly under siege from those very issues that cause us to worry. The two, in many ways, are our constant companions. This relates to communication because the act of communicating, no matter how well planned, is fraught with all manner of noise and potential interruptions. But the challenges that those hurdles represent are what often inspire us to communicate more effectively and then instill in us deeper levels of happiness and pride than we would otherwise have known.